Bryin on Authors

Hey, this is Bryin! I just now realized how long it's been since I've hacked my author's blog. I guess I've been so busy being written about that I haven't had time to cause trouble! That's just sad... So now that I'm here... Now that I'm here... Ugh! Why is it that every time I start thinking of doing something like this, I have all these great ideas of things to post, but when I actually start posting I forget everything! I think I'll blame my author for that. Not because I have an actual reason as to why it's her fault, but because pretty much everything that happens to me is her fault. She is an evil mastermind, and I don't think she deserves to have the freedom to write books any longer! I say, we join together and ban her from creating anymore stories! I don't want to like, erase all the books she has already written, of course. That would mean erasing me, and I'm not prepared to do that. But I would like to stop future character from suffering at her hand. I think you can all agree with me that my author is cruel and must be stopped... Or maybe I should stop, as it just dawned on me that if it was at all possible for me to ban her from writing stories, she would probably erase me anyways...

You know something? Normal people don't have the same worries that book characters do. Not just the worries that come from their books, like that fact that their lives are most likely in danger most of the time, depending on what book they come from. But also the fact that when they're not being written about and they do something their author doesn't like, their author could just erase them from existence, or kill them off in some horrible way, or make everyone they've ever cared about suffer... Did it occur to anyone how evil authors are? They create all of these plots and schemes for their characters to sort though just for their own pleasure. I am against all authors from this point on. Most of you probably don't understand considering you're not book characters, but whatever.

And another thing about authors. Is it just my author, or are all authors extreme stalkers? It's creepy enough that I was created in my author's head, but to have her watching me all the time, following me everywhere I go, and writing everything that happens down in that notebook of her's... I find that disturbing. Now if only I could get a restraining order... Except I don't know how well that would work out for her because I'm sort of in her head all the time...

And not only all of this other stuff, but my author is delusional! And she drinks too much coffee. Even if she just thinks about writing, she'll make herself some. It's gross! Coffee is one of the most disgusting things ever! I would understand if it was tea loaded with sugar, but coffee? Why do people even like that stuff? I think that fact that people drink coffee is even crazier than I am...

Um, I think I got off topic there. That happens a lot, doesn't it. But, hey! I stayed on the right topic a lot longer than I usually do! Maybe I'm getting better at this... Ha, ha, ha! That's a funny idea. I'm never going to get better at not being random. And I won't ever stop rambling either. Just the fact that I'm still talking proves that. But it's not really my fault. Usually my author stops me by now... Hm... I expected her to pop in. Most of the time she does when I mention her. Yay! I have officially hacked this blog without being discovered! Boy, am I in trouble when she finds out. I think I'm gonna go hide now. Bye!